Estimated Reading Time 8 Minutes
Hey You! Guess what? I’m back, haha. It’s true. My name is Emily Romrell and after several weeks of being MIA, I’m happy to be here with you again for another episode of The Vibrant Life Podcast. Thanks for being patient with me. You know, life is messy for all of us, and all we can do is our best. But I’m psyched to be back on an upswing and I’m happy to be back sharing more thoughts with you.
I’ve been in a slump dealing with some personal struggles. But as I’ve grown older I’m realizing that, that’s okay. In my past, I’ve been really hard on myself when I’ve fallen down into various funks. I’d developed this limiting belief that I should always be climbing straight upward in life towards my best self. Not only is that unrealistic, but it’s also exhausting and depressing.
For years when I found myself in a slump, which is inevitable from time to time, I would really beat myself up. If you can relate, I’m giving you permission right now, to stop it. Today’s topic is Un-Slumping Yourself. The very first step is to be gentle with yourself. I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to fall down sometimes. We all do.
Are you a Batman fan? I am. And I love this recurring theme in Batman Begins with Christian Bale. (Side note: Christian Bale will always be the best Batman in my opinion.) At the beginning of the movie Bruce Wayne literally falls down into a well and gets hurt. His father rescues him and explains, “Why do we fall, Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.” Later when Bruce is an adult, he again finds himself in a very low place. All of his efforts to make a difference seem to have failed. But the faithful Alfred reminds him again with the same words, “Why do we fall sir? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.” It’s a hard lesson, but all of us are required to learn it, repeatedly.
I’ve always been a lover of stories. And the most important story for each of us is literally our own life. In my personal journey over the last few years, I’ve become intimately aware of how important it is to own your story, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Because when you truly own your past and where you’ve come from, you gain the power that comes from acceptance. And after acceptance comes accountability. When you own your story, you also realize you have the power to create your future. And a major part of owning your story is realizing that you’re going to fall down and get into scrapes. You’re gonna get beat up.
In another fantastic movie, Rocky Balboa, Sylvester Stallone reminds us:
Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done!
So all that to say that we all get into slumps, so please don’t beat yourself up. Life does that enough already. But how do you go about un-slumping yourself? It definitely takes some effort, but I have a few suggestions:
1. Clean Up Your Surroundings
I’m not the cleanest person in the world, but I am usually pretty good about keeping a nice home and taking care of basic chores. But I know that when I fall into the occasional funk that I tend to let things go. The truth is my friends that our outer environment affects us dramatically. Have you ever stopped to notice that even though you may not enjoy the work, you often feel satisfied after getting a job done? Somehow when you clean up your surroundings, you also shine up your spirit in the process as well.
If you’re looking around right now and feeling overwhelmed, no worries. Don’t stress about how much you have to do or how long the work is going to take. Start small. When you are moving from room to room in the house, look for things that are out of place that you can set right as you go. That will help a lot. And I’ve found that when I actually get going, I keep going. It’s all about getting some momentum, right? And putting your outside in order truly does help your insides so much.
2. Go Outside
My next suggestion is related to the previous one. How long has it been since you’ve spent more than twenty minutes outside? Humans are basically house plants with complicated emotions, and we need sunshine and fresh air to thrive. I’ve seen a lot of jokes about going on walks for mental health, but joking aside, it works. Again, start small. You don’t have to run a marathon or anything. I mean, if you want to train for one, more power to ya. That’s awesome. But if you are trying to get back on top of things, just start being outside. Literally, smell the flowers and admire the beauty in the world. Lay in the grass and watch the clouds like you’re a kid again. I promise you will be rewarded if you try it.
3. Phone A Friend
Do you remember the game show Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? I’m not sure if it’s still on the air or not, but one of the lifelines you could use if you needed help on the show was to phone a friend. I think most of us have at least a couple of friends we can admit are wiser than we are. And phoning a friend is a lifeline in real life that more of us should take advantage of. (Side note: texting is ok, but I would really encourage you to call or talk to a friend in person. There is something about hearing the voice of a person you care about that makes a big difference.)
If you’re like me, it’s easy to get caught up in your own head. Friends are there to bounce ideas off of, they are there to just listen, they have shoulders to cry on, and if you don’t want to get mushy, you can just hang out and have some fun.
It makes me think of that James Taylor song You’ve Got A Friend, (actually, I think Carol King wrote it, and she sings a great version as well, but I think James Taylor has the most popular recording.) Anyway, I know I’m a nerd, but the song says it all. “Just call out my name, and you know wherever I am, I’ll come running. You’ve got a friend.” We all want to be that kind of friend for others in our lives, right? But it is just as important to let your friends be those people for you.
Also, don’t get caught up in the trap of thinking that your friends or family should magically know to check up on you. We all try to keep tabs on the people we care about, but life is crazy. One thing that I’ve learned and am still working on is simply reaching out and asking for what you need. So switch that saying up and you call them, don’t wait for them to call you.
4. Listen To Music, Make Some Art, Build Something, Cook Something, Just CREATE
I love music and it’s very cathartic for me. I love simply listening to good music, but also playing my guitar is great therapy. I also love to cook or do anything creative really. If you are in a slump, you might want to think about how long it’s been since you’ve created something. There is healing power in creation. It doesn’t matter what it is. Do whatever sounds fun for you. But when you can at something and say, “I made that,” it’s an incredible feeling. And it builds confidence. Don’t worry about being perfect. Just enjoy the experience and you might find that slump slipping away.
I know these suggestions are not earth-shattering. I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned all of them before on this podcast. But the truth is that it’s these simple basic things that make the biggest difference. The most important thing to remember though my friends, is don’t give up. Be kind and patient with yourself and keep trying. Things will get better.
You know some of the best life advice out there is from the famous Dr. Seuss. In Oh, The Places You’ll Go he actually talks about slumps, and I want to finish out this episode with an excerpt from that story:
I’m sorry to say so
but, sadly, it’s true
that Bang-ups
and Hang-ups
can happen to you.
You can get all hung up
in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on.
You’ll be left in a Lurch.
You’ll come down from the Lurch
with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then,
that you’ll be in a Slump.
And when you’re in a Slump,
you’re not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.
You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted. But mostly they’re darked.
A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?
And IF you go in, should you turn left or right…
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it’s not, I’m afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.
You can get so confused
that you’ll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles cross weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place…
…for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or the waiting around for a Yes or No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.
Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for the wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.
NO!
That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape
all that waiting and staying
You’ll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.
With banner flip-flapping,
once more you’ll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!
I believe that you are that kind of a guy or a gal. So while it’s okay to get in a slump now and then don’t stay there. Don’t spend too long in that waiting place. Take some basic steps to un-slump yourself and get back on your way to living your vibrant life. I hope you have a fantastic week my friends. Take care and Live The Vibrant Life!
