Estimated Reading Time 9 Minutes
Hey You! I’m Emily Romrell and this is The Vibrant Life Podcast. We are on episode 36 people. The weeks just keep rolling by and hopefully, the podcasts keep getting better and better. I hope y’all have had a great week. I have. My family and I have been working on a project that I am stoked to announce really soon, hopefully, it’ll be a go for next week. I can’t give away the details yet, but you don’t want to miss it. So stay tuned.
I also had the chance to connect with a few friends that I haven’t heard from in a while and that always feels good. I just want to put this out there. I did a podcast early on called Never Suppress A Generous Thought. It’s episode thirteen and you should check it out if you haven’t yet. I’ll put a link in the show notes. Anyway, this principle has brought so many happy moments and so many blessings into my life. Here’s the secret: If you are thinking about someone, text them. If you love someone, tell them. If you are thankful to someone, let them know. I don’t know why, but so many times we stop ourselves because we feel silly, or we simply get distracted in the daily grind. But if you make a small effort to recognize those thoughts when they come and act on them, it can really change your life.
Also if you haven’t subscribed to the podcast yet, do it! You know you want to. That way there’s no effort on your part. The next episode is always ready and waiting when you pull up your podcast app. The Vibrant Life Podcast is on all the major platforms so just choose your favorite. And if you feel like you’re benefiting from the messages, please leave a review on iTunes. It really makes a difference in getting the podcast into the ears of as many people as possible. And while you’re at it, share the love with your friends and family. Your support means so much. Thanks in advance.
Okie Dokie, today we’re talking about something really fun. And like the best things in life it’s also useful. I’m not sure about you, but I’m old enough to remember a hilarious tv show called Whose Line Is It Anyway? I think it came out in the late nineties. But it’s a super funny show where some goofy people do improv live in front of an audience. They do a bunch of different games but the key is that everything happens in the moment. Nothing is planned ahead. If you’re a theatre person, then maybe you can guess where I’m going with this. There’s one rule when you do improv. You can’t say no. Whatever the person next to you proposes, you go with it. Then you make the next move. They call this saying YES…AND Which is our focus today.
Sometimes I feel like my life is a comedy. Do you ever feel like that? I think about the different scenarios I’m faced with and I just have to laugh. Sometimes so I don’t cry, right? Seriously, life hands us some crazy situations not to mention difficult ones. And sometimes you do need to say no, especially if we’re talking boundaries and relationships, or making correct choices. But more often than not, you just have to deal with what life hands you. And a really great method to deal with the cards you’re dealt is to follow the rule of improv. Say YES…AND.
I’m not a poker player but from what I’ve seen in tv and movies, you can basically say to life, “Well, I’ll see your twenty dollars AND raise you fifty.” But you’re not bluffing your way through the game. You work with the hand you have, or with the two hands at the end of your arms, right? (Yes, I know I am so cheesy, but it’s true.) You have to work with what ya got. And that is a matter simply being yourself. Also, I know that I’m joking around a bit. But I also know that the struggles we all face can truly be humbling. I am not making light of that. So let’s dive into some possibilities.
Obviously there are two parts to this concept. I guess I’m all about imagery right now. Think of the situation you are applying the concept of YES…AND to as a coin toss. The first side is the YES. The flip side is the AND. It doesn’t matter which side you land on. Both sides have benefits, and sometimes the AND comes first. But whichever side you land on, you have the ability to come out on top.
What are some possible ANDS we can apply to a vibrant life? Here are a few I came up with:
Thanksgiving is right around the corner and being grateful is perhaps the best AND you can tack on to a situation. Take these examples:
- I just lost my job AND I’m thankful for some unplanned time to spend with my family, not to mention my family’s support.
- I am dealing with some tough medical issues AND I’m grateful for my body and how it continues to allow me to touch, taste, see, and feel so many wonderful things, not to mention that my body has survived everything thrown at it up to this point.
- My friend hurt me in a way that I would never have expected AND I can be thankful for this experience which will allow me to be wiser in the future, not to mention I have other friends who love and support me in so many ways.
You get the picture. This AND of gratitude isn’t always easy to implement. You can think the thoughts in your mind but it’s harder to allow yourself to truly embrace the emotions of being thankful. But I’m telling ya, it’s powerful.
Another AND you can use is playfulness:
- I had a long, tiring day at work AND now I am ready to play with my beautiful kids. What a wonderful way to relieve some stress.
- I just had a serious talk with someone I love AND now I’m going to lighten the mood with a playful nudge and a corny joke.
- My house is a disaster zone because I’ve let things go AND I’m going to dance playfully to my favorite music while I clean up. My laundry basket will become a basketball hoop AND I’m going to slide on the kitchen floor in my socks.
By choosing to be cheerful and maybe even frolicsome as you play with the different scenarios in your life, you might be surprised at how joyful an ordinary day can be. This is basically The Mary Poppins Effect, right? For more on this idea you can check out episode 12 of the podcast, haha.
Here’s the truth: all of these different parts of living a vibrant life are interconnected, right? One idea or concept influences the next. That’s why when you improve in one area you also improve in others. I probably need to do a podcast on synergy sometime. Synergy simply acknowledges that the combination/cooperation of two or more things are often greater than the sum of the separate parts. one plus one can actually equal more than two haha. We’ll save that for another day. But as I dig into different ideas for the podcast, the way everything links together sinks in deep.
Thanks for bearing with me as I got sidetracked for a minute. But here in this moment is another great example. I’m delivering a message on the benefits of improvisation AND I can connect the dots into other areas of a vibrant life. I want to point out that the AND’s in life don’t always have to apply to hard things. They can add another layer of meaning in whatever you are going through: struggles, joys, pains, or just everyday experiences.
During junior high and high school, I played the clarinet. When I was young I imagined myself being a great improviser in jazz music. I am not a jazz expert at all, and my skills are extremely limited. I’ve mainly switched over to guitar these days, but now and then I pull out my old clarinet and some decent tunes come out. I also enjoy listening to old school jazz songs. They seem to emphasize all the good things in life. But musicians in all genres improvise in varying degrees. It’s a big part of what music is. Improvisation makes songs original and allows for imagination and innovation.
Do you want to know the secret to great improvisation? You find the core of the song, the bones and structure that make the thing what it is, that tell the story you want to tell. Then you apply the AND. You make the song yours. You add the notes that can only be uniquely applied by you in that moment. The really cool thing is that as you are doing all this on your instrument, you find a harmony with the rest of the musicians as they all are doing the same thing. When it’s done just right, it’s magic.
Improvisation is not limited to music, though. If you look at the biggest influencers, the most successful, and the happiest people in this world. You will find that they have mastered the skill of improvisation. They know how to take the heart of whatever they are working with and make it their own.
Okay, I think we have covered the AND side of the coin pretty well. Now let’s talk about the YES. In all of the previous examples so far, there was an element of acceptance, right? There literally can be no AND unless you say yes to the situation. You embrace what’s happening to you then continue with the AND. But there is so much more to saying YES.
This side of the coin is something that I often struggle with and I’m honestly still working on this in my personal life. But I know in my soul that the value in this half of the concept is priceless. I’m talking about saying YES to opportunities and experiences that come our way.
Have you ever been offered the chance to do something new, but you dismissed the opportunity because it scared you? Maybe the offer was something you just never imagined doing so you closed the door without even truly considering it. Maybe you felt you were too busy with other things. Maybe you don’t know the person who is giving you this opportunity very well and you don’t want to be a bother, or you’re not convinced they are sincere, or whatever. Maybe you simply don’t want to put in the effort. It is so easy to say no for a multitude of reasons.
Right now, I’m inviting you to say YES. Be thoughtful about your decisions, but say YES as often as you can. Let’s take all of my excuses above and put them out of their misery:
- It scares you. I’m a huge fan of quotes, and I can’t tell you how many ways different thought leaders have conveyed this truth: if something scares you, it’s probably a good thing to try. That idea can be found in various forms all over the place. Unless you have a legitimate reason for saying no, say YES to going outside your comfort zone and doing those things that scare you. You will find you have more courage than you originally believed. And you will have those adventures that make life worth living, even if they are everyday adventures. Sometimes those are the best kind.
- You never imagined yourself doing something like that. This is a dumb excuse and you know it. Open your mind and heart and make room for imagination. Do things that are different. Say YES.
- You are too busy. Okay Peeps. I know there are all the things. We all need to make a living and provide for our families. We all have commitments that are important to keep. Don’t make that an excuse to say no. If something really matters, you can make the time for it. It may requre some finagling. But you can do it and you won’t be sorry. Make the time to say YES to those things that make life worth living.
- You don’t know the person providing the opportunity well, or you are not sure about their sincerity etc. I’m as guilty as the next person at this, but we humans over think things too much. We should take people at their word. Seriously, if someone makes the effort to invite you to do something, believe that the offer is genuine. A new opportunity is a fabulous way to turn an aquaintance into a friend.
- You don’t want to put in the effort. Again I feel ya, my friends. Managing energy is key and when you are dealing with hard things putting more energy and effort into new experiences can be super challenging. But personally, I have never once regretted that kind of effort. You may even be surprised to find yourself more energized by saying YES and doing something truly worthwhile.
Don’t say no to life out of habit. Live deliberately. By saying YES as often as possible to the opportunites life hands us, our lives will be richer, more meaningful, more fun, and you guessed it, more vibrant. If we can say YES…AND it’s even better. Anytime someone makes you an offer or requests something of you big or small, consider what saying YES would mean. Then consider how you could add to that opportunity or request with an AND that is uniquely yours. Put a little improv into your day to day.
Thanks for taking the time to listen, my friends. Take care and have a terrific week!
